Tulane and Johnny opened a novelty shop
Back under the corner, was the cream of the crop
Everything was clicking and the business was good
Till one day, lo  behold an officer stood
Johnny jumped the counter but he stumbled and fell
Tulane made it up Johnny belted a yell
Go head on, Tulane, he cant catch up with you
Go Tulane, he aint man enough for you
Go Tulane, use all the speed you got
Go Tulane, you know you need a lot
Go Tulane, he  lagging behind
Go head on, Tulane. Go head on
Go by your fathers house and tell him business is slow
See if he will loan you something, soon as you get the dough
Put the cat out in the hall and rumple up the room
Go by Doctor Kell and tell him you swallowed some perfume
Tell him you need him quick so he may to testify
You been sick all day and thats the  perfect alibi
Go head on, Tulane, he cant catch up with you
Go Tulane, he aint man enough for you
Go Tulane, use all the speed you got
Go Tulane, you know you need a lot
Go Tulane, he  lagging behind
Go head on, Tulane. Go head on

Go, let Danny drive in case you run into the Man
Back by the shop and get the stuff and hide it in the van
Go back to your fathers, get the money for the bail
Bring it down and bail me out this rotten funky jail
We gotta get a lawyer if we check the politics
Somebody who can win this thing or get this thing fixed
Go head on, Tulane, he cant catch up with you
Go Tulane, he aint man enough for you
Go Tulane, use all the speed you got
Go Tulane, you know you need a lot
Go Tulane, he  lagging behind
Go head on, Tulane. Go head on